Ask The Expert
Banish the Booze
Most of us like a glass of wine or two in the evenings. But, what do you do if you suspect your fondness for a tipple is turning into dependency? Debbie Rix offers some straight-talking advice to a worried mum of two...
Dear Debbie
I've always thought of myself as a 'social drinker', but following a supposed January detox I'm a bit worried. I'm a 35-year-old mum with two teenage children. I go out a couple of weekends a month, but other than that I have a few glasses of wine at home in the evening. A friend suggested that we cut out the booze and get fit in January, which I thought sounded a good idea. But when it came down to it I just couldn't go through with it. I managed a few days, but had trouble sleeping and was in a bad mood all day knowing that I couldn't have a glass of wine in the evening. I cracked within the first week and am now back drinking at least half a bottle each night. Is this normal?
Thanks,
Mandy
UKTV Style's Agony Aunt replies:
Hi Mandy,
I suspect this question will resonate with quite a lot of people. Many of us - myself included - are in the habit of having a glass or two of wine each day. We like it, it tastes nice, it goes well with food and, if we're honest, can be very relaxing. But, there's a big difference between the controlled enjoyment of wine, and being unable to get through a day without it. So what we need to explore with you is whether you have a habit that can easily be broken, or are you flirting with addiction?
It was a good idea to try to give up for a month and detox. Many habitual drinkers do this from time to time - either just to test themselves or because circumstances force them to - they may be pregnant or taking medication. I do it myself periodically and when I do, I generally feel better and sleep really well.
You, on the other hand, felt worse when you stopped, which suggests something akin to withdrawal symptoms. Forgive me, if I'm overstepping the mark, but I wonder if you are being entirely truthful with me as to how much you are actually drinking each day. If it is more than half a bottle, the chances are that your drinking may be interfering with your ability to function properly as a mother. Can you cook supper, help with homework, sit and chat with your kids and give them advice? Could you drop everything and drive them safely to casualty if you had to? If you're not sure that you could, that's not just a couple of glasses with supper - that is the start of an unhealthy addiction and would certainly explain your inability to sleep, and your bad temper when faced with the prospect of a few dry days.
I've always thought of myself as a 'social drinker', but following a supposed January detox I'm a bit worried. I'm a 35-year-old mum with two teenage children. I go out a couple of weekends a month, but other than that I have a few glasses of wine at home in the evening. A friend suggested that we cut out the booze and get fit in January, which I thought sounded a good idea. But when it came down to it I just couldn't go through with it. I managed a few days, but had trouble sleeping and was in a bad mood all day knowing that I couldn't have a glass of wine in the evening. I cracked within the first week and am now back drinking at least half a bottle each night. Is this normal?
Thanks,
Mandy
UKTV Style's Agony Aunt replies:
Hi Mandy,
I suspect this question will resonate with quite a lot of people. Many of us - myself included - are in the habit of having a glass or two of wine each day. We like it, it tastes nice, it goes well with food and, if we're honest, can be very relaxing. But, there's a big difference between the controlled enjoyment of wine, and being unable to get through a day without it. So what we need to explore with you is whether you have a habit that can easily be broken, or are you flirting with addiction?
It was a good idea to try to give up for a month and detox. Many habitual drinkers do this from time to time - either just to test themselves or because circumstances force them to - they may be pregnant or taking medication. I do it myself periodically and when I do, I generally feel better and sleep really well.
You, on the other hand, felt worse when you stopped, which suggests something akin to withdrawal symptoms. Forgive me, if I'm overstepping the mark, but I wonder if you are being entirely truthful with me as to how much you are actually drinking each day. If it is more than half a bottle, the chances are that your drinking may be interfering with your ability to function properly as a mother. Can you cook supper, help with homework, sit and chat with your kids and give them advice? Could you drop everything and drive them safely to casualty if you had to? If you're not sure that you could, that's not just a couple of glasses with supper - that is the start of an unhealthy addiction and would certainly explain your inability to sleep, and your bad temper when faced with the prospect of a few dry days.
