Once you begin to feel a bit more confident in your appearance, you will hopefully find the courage to go out looking for work! Nine years is a long time to be out of the workplace, but every year thousands of women get back to work after long child breaks. Employers are very understanding about why women have been out of the job market, and what better reason could there be than looking after their children? They also know that mothers are responsible, have great communication and negotiating skills, are hard-working and reliable. If you had a good career before you had children, think seriously of returning to it, for the least amount of retraining. But if you hated it, then this is your big chance for a change. Do a computer course, upgrade your skills and see what you might be eligible for.

The most important thing about looking for a new job, is to talk to people about it. Other mothers at school, shopkeepers, people you meet in cafés, it’s amazing where a few conversations can lead and hopefully, within a few months you will have found something that will interest you as well as bringing in income.

Finally, it sounds like you need to build a circle of friends around you. It’s a shame that your family are so far away, but girlfriends will offer great support. How about helping out at your children’s school or join the PTA there and help with a bit of fund-raising? It will get you out of yourself and out of the house. Try to give yourself a routine for the week, perhaps join a gym or exercise class. Basically stop locking yourself up at home. You have so much to live for, and remember the old cliché, life is not a rehearsal, make sure you enjoy yours to the full.

Best wishes,

Debbie