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Have We Got Some Captions for You

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Have We Got Some Captions for You

You know how they ususually end Have I Got News You by coming up with captions for a bizarre image? Well, we turned the tables on the HIGNFY crew and asked you to come up with some funny captions for this photo of Paul, Ian and Angus...

Thanks to everyone who submitted a caption. It was a tough choice deciding on a winner, so congratulations to Rachel from Tonbridge who came up with the judge's favourite:

"PAUL TO IAN AND ANGUS: You can't seriously be running the London Marathon in suits."


Here's a selection of some other entries we liked:


  • "When we aimed the tub of lard at Paul's head, we didn't mean to cause permanent injury. But doctors say he'll be a vegetable for the rest of his life."

  • "A game of animal, vegetable or mineral goes too far..."

  • "Paul is one of the essential ingredients in Have I Got STEWS for you."

  • "Of course it's organic, we haven't even shaved his legs."

  • "ANGUS TO IAN: He's the exception to the rule that carrots are good for your eyes."

  • "I may be a carrot, but I'm stuck at the end of a right pair."

  • "IAN: I don't even want to see the size of the rabbit you must be meeting Angus."

  • "Don't mind me, I'm dressed for my next appointment - I'm going to go home and veg out."

  • "Paul tries his best to cover for Jasper Carrott who failed to arrive for rehearsals."

  • "Paul's standing as a Lib Dem with green credentials."

  • "Obviously Angus is only getting two of his five portions of fruit and veg today."
  • "When I said I wanted to become a Veggie, this wasn't what I had in mind."

  • "We won't get a permanent host dangling this carrot."

  • "Paul Merton had somewhat misinterpreted the instruction to come dressed in the style of something from Marks and Spencers".

  • "IAN HISLOP: I said we should recreate the Dead PARROT sketch."

  • "OK, Paul, we give in. What's orange and sounds like a parrot?"

  • "I don't think your green tie really goes with that outfit..."

  • "Paul Merton was the first to take advantage of the BBC's new 'dress down Friday' directive."

  • "We think the experiment into genetically altered foods has gone a bit far."

  • "I thought you said you were dating a Swede, Angus."
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