Posts by: T G Raymondo

Now come on you rotten lot at UKTV.

UK History was one of the most watchable channels on Freeview. Even watching the World at War for the umpteenth time, I was still learning things that I'd not been aware of or put into proper context before.

Now, I get home from work and just manage to sneak a few minutes viewing before it goes off air on Freeview at 6pm.

What have I got instead ?
Some silly channel named Dave and the Tumbleypoos on Cbeebies !

Please put UKTV History back on to Freeview in the evenings, as it was originally. There's got to be something educational, informative and enlightening on Freeview for mature adults to watch. Everything else is pretty mindless.

Obviously I see a connection between Poldark and UK History, but shouldn't Poldark really be on UK Drama. I expect everything I watch on UK History be factually accurate and reliable, educational and informative. I'm not sure that Poldark quite falls into that category. Because its a drama I suspect there's some artistic licence in there somewhere.

Yes, I commented last year that UKTV Gold isn't really showing programmes that would categorize as Gold these days. Glad you've all picked up on it too.

But what's Gold and what's not ?

I suppose its down to personal taste, to some extent, but wouldn't the majority agree with the obvious classics such as Dads Army, Z-cars and classic episodes of Doctor Who featuring Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker, when the show was at its peak. But perhaps not every story from Doctor Who or Z-cars. Some were rubbish, just show the good ones - do you remember the Doctor and Jo Grant battling Yeti on the London Underground ? That was really scary when I was little. I'd love to see that one again.

I'm a bit too young to remember the sixties TV comedy when it was first broadcast. From what I've seen of the re-runs and short clips from that period, it is quite funny, but it is very different to whats on the box today. You've got to see humour in Harold Steptoe having horse dung on his boots, and Tony Hancock putting some strange words to the German National Anthem in the Blood Donor Clinic. You also need to take Alf Garnetts words of wisdom for what they really were, a social comment on what many people really thought at that time.

Anyway. Not much more to say about the sixties really, other than I'd rather watch a re-run of a sixties TV comedy than the offensive rubbish that is on offer in the noughties.

My preference is undoubtedly the comedy that I grew up with in my formative teenage years, which I suspect is how most people will ultimately vote - if anybody bothers to look at that side of it scientifically. For me then, its the 70's.

The Young Ones, plus SlackBladder and Balders in various guises. Quite funny at the time I suppose, but have those shows really stood the test of time. I don't remember any truly great moments in any of them. Miranda Richardsons portrayal of Queen Elizabeth was and still is great, but I like that because of the acting more than the comedy. I can't think of any scene in BlackAdder that really sticks in my mind, other than the poignant one at the end of BlackAdder Goes Forth - and that's not comedy. The only sketch I routinely look out for on the re-runs of the Young Ones is University Challenge.

The 80's had Arkwright and Granville of course. But this too falls into the same sort of category. Funny at the time. Worth watching again, but it is hard to recall any truly great "Don't tell him Pike!" moments.

'Allo 'Allo was quite good though. From the same authors that penned Dads Army. It sends up the French, the Germans, the Italians and us Brits in equal measures. Can't help thinking that the multitude of catch phrases would have worked even better on the radio, in the 1950's and 60's.

Then there's the Trotters. The biggest laughs from them in the 1980's were "Triggers Broom", again its a clever use of ordinary everyday language, the slapstick Chandelier stunt and the visual spectacle of Mum Trotters grave painted in luminous paint.

Overall, I think I would describe the 80's comedy as something of a curates egg, good in parts.

Naughties just about sums up the standard of comedy these days. Generally disgraceful stuff, not clever humour at all really - its just pushing the limits to raise a laugh through shock-value. Scraping the bottom of the barrel.

I don't think any of the so-called comedy shows are really worthy of the name, with the possible exception of Last of the Summer Wine. If you want to find real humour, you've got to look away from the comedy programmes and delve into something like Top Gear or Doctor Who. Even News24 has more laughs in it some days.

The funniest moment in the nineties has to Del Boy and Rodney's Batman and Robin moment. No dodgy language, nobody is insulted. Its all about situation, two situations in fact, and some great visual images. Its wonderful benchmark comedy.

Believe it or not, the only other thing I remember from the nineties as being great comedy was in the Thin Blue Line, where they re-worked the "My Dogs got no nose" joke. I still can't believe they had the nerve to do that, but it worked and it got a big laugh, perhaps not for the joke, but for the nerve of doing it and the straight face with which it is was done.

By the way. Red Dwarf isn't really funny. Chuckleworthy in places I grant you, but its not in the same league as Batman & Robin.

If I think back over the moments that have had me splitting my sides, more have come from the 1970's than any other decade.

The biggest laugh that I recall from the 1970's, the very first time it was screened, was "Don't tell him Pike !" from Dads Army. That was a really well thought out use of ordinary everyday language. It is still a talking point 35 years later. I'm chuckling about it now, as I think of that scene.

Then we had Morecambe and Wise, with their wonderful song and Dance send-ups and, of course, their memorable Breakfast to the Stripper.

"Some Mothers do 'Ave em", was compulsive viewing, for its slapstick comedy. I don't think there was any significant bad language in it, but you knew exactly what Frank Spencers victims were feeling and thinking from their physical reactions and expressions. Much cleverer than what we see today.

And what about Dave Allens sketches. I really used to look forward to those, particularly those that featured Funerals !

We mustn't forget to mention Fawlty Towers, and the memorable episode with the Germans.

Norman Stanley Fletcher in Porridge was compulsive viewing and it is still popular today.

The Carry-on films were starting to go a bit too far in the 1970's, but there are still some fabulous laughs to look back on. Private Widdle in Carry-on up the Khyber was a funny enough name, but discovering much later in the film, just as we were getting used to the silly name, that his Christian name was James, Jimmy to his friends, was really good use of humour developed over an extended period. I haven't seen anybody get two laughs out of the same joke in the same sort of way for a very long time.

Monty Python had one or two sketches of pure genius, I'm thinking of the Dead Parrot, the Fish-slapping Dance, Ministry of Silly Walks and the LumberJack song, but most of it wasn't that funny really and was setting the scene for the dross that was served up as "alternative comedy" in the 1980's and beyond. It was all downhill after Monty Python. Comedians saw what they'd been able to get away with and tried to outdo them. The quality of humour on TV, generally speaking, has spiralled downwards since then. Shame. The 70's were undoubtedly the best overall.

I've found the WRC coverage on Dave to be long on talk and short on action. Could be much better, I think. I like to see extended in-car footage intermixed with external shots that allows me to admire the skill of the driver. That's every bit as important to the real enthusiast as the incidents and crashes.

Well, yes, I agree that the Daleks are probably the Doctors greatest enemy, but the biggest villain is the Master.

There's a subtle difference between enemies and villains. Check the dictionary. Enemies are actively hostile opponents, so the Daleks fit that bill perfectly. Villains are wicked rascals, and that describes the Master perfectly. He even looks like he's come straight from a Pantomime !

But perhaps the biggest villain is the person who decreed that Daleks could now fly. The Daleks menace originally came from the way they slowly trundled around corridors and there was absolutely no escape from those indestructible metal monsters.

The Daleks shape is of course ideal for trundling around corridors. It just doesn't work when they fly. They have all the aerodynamic properties of a Pineapple.

Now that Daleks can fly their menace has gone. We're not as easily frightened by something that simply doesn't look right. Daleks have become the Space Invaders in the arcade game and nobodys frightened by that because we know they can easily be shot down.

Looking through canditates for Britains Best Historical site, I've noticed that some of our greatest assets have been wonderfully restored from a ruined state. The SS Great Britain is perhaps the best example of that. When you visit such a site, I think it is a greater, more inspiring experience for having been restored. The rusting hulk of the SS Great Britain wouldn't be much of an attraction, would it ?

So why can't more of our ruined heritage be restored ? I'm not persuaded that it is entirely due to money, or rather the lack of it. It seems to be a cultural thing. We seem to take the view that if something is ruined we should reverentially preserve the ruins for future generations rather than make any serious effort at reconstructing them.

If we restore anything, more often than not it tends to be mechanical rather than structural. Why is that ?

If I can use just one very well known site as an example, acknowledging that it is a controversial example, which would you rather visit; Stonehenge where all of the stones were re-erected and you could experience the site as it was originally intended, or what we currently have there as a Tourist attraction ?

There are thousands of other ruined sites from which you can substitute your favourite into the same basic question. Do you favour conservation or restoration ?

Tintern Abbey is an awe-inspiring ruin in a wonderful location. Great when it looms out of the mist as you approach it.

Would be even better if it was completely intact. Henry VIII has a lot to answer for !

The whole of Portsmouth Historic Dockyard is worth a visit, not just HMS Victory, but Nelsons flagship is clearly the biggest treasure. One could probably spend all day here.

I should note that I haven't actually visited Dover Castle, but can I just say in reply to DoverBoy that whether one considers it rubbish or not obviously depends upon what one expects from a historical site.

I note that Alton Towers is also in the Britains Best listings, with burger vans and rollercoasters everywhere you look so it is obviously great fun - but is it that sort of thrill factor that makes a historical site "Great" or is it the inspiration that comes from understanding what has happened on that site in the past and its significance/relevance to our current lifestyle ?

Looking at castle can be a bit like looking at a work of art. Some will see a few blobs of paint or a scruffy pile of stones. Others will see the bigger picture............

History is endless.
Human ingenuity is endless.

We don't necessarily have to be grateful for everything that previous generations and cultures have developed, we could do without taxation for a start, but it is worth knowing where all sorts of everyday things that we take for granted originated. Even if we only use them in a pub-quiz or in the annual Christmas day outing of Trivial pursit !

Its a worthwhile series.

I rest my case !

If I had to pick one image that portrayed Britain to the rest of the world, it would be the stone circle at Stonehenge. The stone circle is a global icon, the UKs equivalent of the Statue of Liberty.

When first faced with the question, what is Britains Best Historical site, the Tower of London sprang immediately to my mind.

The Tower is far too touristified these days, I'd like to see it regain its air of mystery and menace, but when you consider everything that has happened on this site over the last 900 years or so, it essentially represents the complete history of Britain.

And there are some fascinating "what if's ?" too, that you can ponder whilst visiting this site.

What if some of the notorious executions and imprisonments hadn't actually happened ? How would that have affected our history ?

Essentially it's a fascinating and stimulating place to be - if you ignore the clicking of cameras.

David Tennant is the best Doctor, by a shortish-head from Jon Pertwee.

Until recently, Jon was my favourite, mainly because I grew up with that character. Anybody else didn't have quite the same magic.

So for David to be my favourite over Jon is a major achievement.

I feel that David brings a wonderful eccentricity to the character, with his expressive eyes mouth hair and mannerisms. That eccentricity fits so well with what I would expect from a scientific genius. Picture Albert Einstein and (of course) Emmet Brown from Back to the Future......

Some of the dialogue, particularly where things are falling into place in his mind and he's seeing the way through the situation seems to be brilliantly improvised.

And the scene where the Doctor is hopping around whilst diverting neutron radiation into his trainer is dubious science, but it is pure theatrical genius.

Well done David. I hope you'll make the role your own for a lot longer yet, we're getting perilously close to the Timelords 12th and supposedly final regeneration. We don't want that to happen too soon !

I am so pleased that this Great ship was salvaged and restored. It is important that we retain this sort of ground-breaking technology wherever we possibly can, to bring the history books to life.

Blenheim Palace was the best day out I had last year. I thoroughly enjoyed it. And it is genuinely a whole day out. There so much to see inside and the grounds are so extensive that you really do need to allow the whole day to see it all. The only thing I found slightly frustrating were the rolled back carpets and the equisite pieces of furniture stuffed in unnatural positions - but that is typical of any Stately home, what you actually see is not how it is lived-in.

And a word of warning. Don't go anywhere near the ornamental temple where Churchill proposed to Clemmie if your girlfriend is with you. There is some sort of spiritual power there that might very well tempt you do likewise !

I hate to spoil everybodys enthusiasm for Avebury, do feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't the stones (or at least some of them) re-erected within the last 100 years or so by some local archeologist ? Move them today and you'll find concrete underneath. So the impression that the stones have been standing for Millenia is slightly inaccurate. Its still a bizarre place to be, an inspiring place to be and it is well worth a visit, but it is not quite what it seems at first sight.

Interesting idea. I bet UKTV aren't brave enough to put Alf back on the box.
Is "Til Death Us do Part" Golden Telly, worthy of the UK TV Gold badge ?
Tricky one that, because it will undoubtedly offend some sections of the community, even if Alf does usually come off worst, and as I've said elsewhere I don't think any programme that is known to cause offence is worthy of the Gold label. Its definitely a classic TV series though and I'd like to see it again, but perhaps it is more suitable for a different channel where it will be seen for what it is and not implicitly hailed as one of UK Televisions finest moments ?

I'm inclined to agree, Life on Mars deserves to be on UKTV Gold. Its a great idea for a TV programme.

But even better, lets put the Sweeney on UKTV too, so we can watch the Ford Consuls doing battle with Mk1 Transits and S type Jags !

My favourite toy, which I still have, is the Escape from Colditz board game. I didn't really understand why I liked it at the time. I think it was released about the same time as the TV series of a similar name, in the early(ish) 70's, and to me at that time it was one of the in-things to own (and to be allowed to watch). Now, aged 46, I can see that the game represented a similar sort of intellectual challenge to the real life drama and because it was devised with the assistance of Major Pat Reid it portrayed the historical events quite wonderfully. Thankfully, although it felt risky, the game was not quite as deadly as real life !

Great title for a TV channel, UKTV Gold, but surely some of the programmes that are repeated here wouldn't ever count as Golden Telly.

There's no question, Dads Army and Fawlty Towers are worthy of inclusion, so too are Only Fools and Horses and Last of the Summer Wine. I've no great objections to the Generation Game, Wogan and Jim'll fix it. The A-team, The Dukes of Hazzard, Thunderbirds, Dr Who and the Goodies all deserve airtime.

But surely programmes like the Catherine Tate Show, The Office, Gimme Gimme Gimme were never mainstream enough and a bit too vulgar to warrant the Gold label ?

Perhaps those in charge of scheduling UKTV Gold should be a little more discerning ? If the programmes could make some people feel uncomfortable or embarrassed when watching them, they're not really Gold, are they ?